Let’s talk about boobs.
I believe I am uniquely placed to talk about boobs since I have had every possible variation. Who knew there were varieties of boobs?!
Let’s start with small boobs. As a young-ish adult, I had small boobs – to me, they actually looked underdeveloped. Like they had meant to grow bigger, but had just stopped mid way. I suspected various reasons for this, and whether correct or not I *really* disliked the fact they were small, or more relevantly, had never fully developed.
After leaving husband #2 I decided it was time to do something about it. Off I trotted to an Italian doctor in Kenya to discuss breast implants….and soon after was in the possession of D/DD sized boobs. I LOVED my new boobs – hours of fun when something dropped into my cleavage, since I’d never had a cleavage before. Lots of jumping up and down trying to give myself a black eye. Or two. And so, so many tight tops. Honestly, for the relatively short time I had them, I enjoyed every single minute.
Fast forward 11 years and I had one (large) boob. Well, fuck that. If there was ever a time to have had small boobs it was now – because there is absolutely no way of hiding a single large boob. Not that I’m all about hiding, but nor am I about having no choice about people knowing that much information about me on first sight.
14 months later, and to this day, I am a ‘flattie’, as those of us who have mastectomies without reconstruction tend to call ourselves. Zero boobs. But holy shit, I have some awesome tattoos in their place.
So you can see I have run the gamut of boobs. In case it’s not obvious, breast cancer was the cause of the last two boob changes – I could have had reconstruction, but I chose tattoos instead. You may or may not know, but reconstruction can leave you with boobs with no feeling. At all. It also involves a lot of surgery, recovery time and has the risk of numerous complications.
Life Changing Times 