Life Changing Times

….your hip but not your boobs.

‘I am bionic’, I tell myself every day, for the past three weeks. While looking forward to another day of hearing ‘oh yes, my 654 year old granny had her hip replaced and it was great/awful/killed her’ at least 64 times. I can’t help but wonder how much I have aged since they are looking at me as they relate their elderly relative story, with only one person so far saying ‘but you look too young to have had this done’.

I mean, it’s awkward, isn’t it? I want to say ‘but, but, but, I’m only 54, not 84!’ Except I’m on the cusp of the age where people may just nod, smile and humour me. And then I’d have to whack them around the head with my crutch and it could get really messy.

So, I just keep whispering to myself ‘I am bionic now. Really, really, bionic’